Belle & Books

Beauty and the Beast is probably my all-time favorite Disney flick. I practically swoon every time I watch the opening scene where she enters the bookshop and flies around the the ladder searching for the next story to captivate her and then strolls through town with her nose stuck in the book. I want to be Belle. Just in case you want to see it for yourself...

So now that I've thouroughly nerdified myself, I'll get on with the meat of this post, assuming anyone is still reading. :)

One of the things I was most looking forward to when school (both teaching and finishing my Masters) was over was having time to read stuff I actually wanted to read! As exciting as journal articles for my capstone and textbooks on educational theory are, I was dying to read some stuff that has been on my must-read list for ages.

So here's what I've read so far this summer:  

The Hunger Games & Catching Fire by Suzanne Collins: I devoured the first two books in the The Hunger Games Trilogy and am waiting on third to come available at the library. I know I'm a little late on this bandwagon (I usually am a bit tardy to the party), but I'd heard all the hype (especially from my kids all school year, I was asked with great enthusiasm a jillion times, "Mrs. Burnett, have you read The Hunger Games yet?" "Oh, you've got to read it!" (as a side note, I was just totally pumped that so many kids were reading, and moreover were excited to read at that! Did this ol' English teacher's heart good!)) and I will say the books did not disappoint! I'm a fan. I haven't seen the movie yet, but I have my misgivings...I'm one of those annoying "the book was sooo much better than the movie" people. 

Life of Pi by Yann Martel: Well, I don't know that I can say I read this because I didn't technically read all of it. I read all of it I could stand: 227 of its excruciatingly boring and theologically whack-o 319 pages. And I made myself push that far through it (I have this annoying, compulsive urge that if I start a book then I have finish it, regardless of whether it is making me wish I was watching paint dry instead of burying my head in its pages.) But as I said, I only made it about 2/3 of the way through this, the first book I ever remember not finishing. While it sounds exciting enough--a boy survives a shipwreck and finds himself on a life boat with, among other beasts, a Bengal tiger--I do not reccomend it. Satiate your need for action/adventure/survival stories elsewhere.   

The Help by Kathryn Stockett: Of course, I'm late to the party here, too. But I am so glad I resisted the urge to see the movie when it was all anyone was talking about because it definitely did not measure up to the book! Stockett did such an amazing job developing the characters and the dynamics between them. I was truly drawn into the story and emotionally invested in the lives of the characters (I warned you in paragraph one of this post I was the nerdy bookworm type, so I make no apologies for being "emotionally invested in the lives of the characters.") Being a proud Mississippi native, this book was at times hard to swallow and made me cringe at the history of my home state in regard to race relations and civil rights. But Stockett's writing made this familar, but sometimes forgotten, message resonate deeply: that we are all--regardless of race, socioeconomic status, gender--people, we all matter, and we should treat each other as such. 

Kisses from Katie by Katie Davis with Beth Clark: the absolutely incredible--and I mean for that to carry the full weight of both of those words--story of a young woman from Brentwood, TN who took and is taking God at His Word, living out the Gospel in Uganda. I read the whole book in one day, but it's not one of those stories you just read and forget about. It's a powerful reminder of who God is, what he asks of those of us who claim His name, and how every.single.life.matters. Muster up some courage to drink in Katie's example of what full obedience, service, and dependence on Jesus looks like. It's not that we all have to pack up and move to Uganda to truly serve Jesus, but I know I've got some re-evaluating to do concerning my Americanized, comfortable, riskless Christianity.      

Up next...

finish The Reason for God by Tim Keller: I'm only a couple chapters in, and I already think everybody, believer or skeptic should read this book. Fascinating, and I would say, a near essential read for those who need to process through life's hard questions and/or want to encourage someone else who is both wondering and wandering.

and lots of reading for school (which will be starting back in just over a month! what?!)...

Brain Rules by John Medina: a school-wide read to support our goal for the 2012-2013 school year. I am actually excited to dive into this. I attended a brain-based-learning seminar last fall, and it truly is incredible how intricately designed our brains are and what makes them function and learn at optimal levels. God is such an amazing Creator!

And the three novels for my my first reading unit I'll be teaching when school starts: The Master Puppeteer, Beauty: A Retelling of Beauty and the Beast, and Black Horses for the King.

So what have you been reading? Do tell! :)

{Oh, and one more thing: if you click on any of the titles I mentioned it will take you a site called Better World Books. I started buying from this site rather than amazon.com or the like because for every book purchased, Better World Books donates a book to someone in need and raises funds for literacy and libraries. Sometimes their prices are a tad higher than amazon.com BUT the fact that Better World Books offers FREE shipping worldwide usually compensates for that difference. *I'm no compensated spokesperson for BWB...I just love finding and shopping with companies who give back! Easy way to make my spending more purposeful!   

The Birds Still Sing...

It's a messy life isn't, it? This world is full of people battling sickness, death, hurt, exhaustion, hunger, unemployment, discontentment, anger, and the list goes on. This morning as I was praying for the needs of dear family and friends, I had a moment where I thought, "Wow. This world is full of junk. We are full of junk." I was overwhelmed by all of the "bad" stuff going on in this life. BUT, just as I was thinking about all of this--I mean, the exact same moment--the Lord tuned my ear to the sound of the birds outside. They were just chirping and singing away, their melody seeping in through my closed windows. I felt the Lord telling me, "Yes, this world is full of junk and suffering, but this world is also full of good--full of Me." All of the hurt we experience in this life does not change who God is. His character--his perfect goodness--remains the same. Jesus is the same yesterday, today, and forever (Hebrews 13:8).

And He is ever kind, ever gracious to give us reminders of His goodness...like the birds he made me hear when I started to get mired down thinking about the difficult stuff.

image via

Oh Lord, that you would tune my ears to hear (and my eyes to see) You, to hear your beauty and your grace echoing all around me.

{And as I finish this post, I realize God is still trying to teach me the lessons He first used Ann Voskamp's book to show me. If you have not yet read One Thousand Gifts, don't miss out.} 

One More Grace

I just got off the phone with a sweet friend.  I asked if her week was off to a good start and she said, you know, I got up with a bit of the "Monday morning blues" but then I saw a post on facebook that reminded me I needed to stop complaining and be thankful...I got to wake up today.  This totally resonated with me and what I've been reading and thinking about lately.

A few weeks ago, I told you I started reading One Thousand Gifts. {I can't tell you how good it is.  God has truly anointed Ann Voskamp and her writing.}  Her whole premise is "All is grace."  Did you get that? (Am I getting that?)  

{ALL is grace.} every breath. every waking up. every day that is brimming over. brimming over with the "good". the "bad".  the busyness.  the tiredness. the joy. the frustrations. all of it. All is grace. 

She included the following quote in one of her chapters. Hit me like an arrow. 

Here dies another day

During which I have had eyes, ears, hands

And the great world 'round me;

And with tomorrow begins another.

Why am I allowed two?

-G.K. Chesterton

Why am I allowed two?

What am I doing with that allowance?

Later in the chapter she goes on to say, "If my inner eye has God seeping up through all things, then can't I give thanks for anything?"

Can't I?  Can't I trust Him--the One who gave up all of heaven for me--that much?  Can't I trust--and live like I trust--that if He gives me the one more grace of today, He has a grander purpose.  A grander purpose than my comfort, my plans, or my wants. 

Oh, for the grace to live like today is a grace rather than a drudgery.

And by the way, I'm on my third listen of this today.

Why "savor"?

Occasionally, one of my friends (actually, she was my adorable 9th grade English teacher) will post a link on her Facebook to a post from A Holy Experience.  You may have already heard of her, Ann Voskamp.  I began reading about a month ago.  Wow. is an understatement to me.  The Lord just saturates this woman.  And she writes so beautifully. Another understatement.  You just have to read for yourself. 

Since I read this post of hers about two weeks ago, I've been meaning to stop and write about it.  I stumbled on it through a link in one of her other posts, and it couldn't have been any more perfect.  Right before I started this blog, I had just graduated from Mississippi State and had no clue what I was going to do or was supposed to do job wise.  And I was anxious, my mind always spinning to figure it out.  As a super-planner-organizer-controller, my natural tendency is to fret and make a plan and try to pinpoint what I need to be doing--what I think I need to be doing.  Instead of focusing on the present, enjoying the present--the gift of the present--I am preoccupied with the future.  Where will I be and what will I be doing tomorrow, next month, next year, in five years. 

I'm not very good at Proverbs 27:1.

{Do not boast about tomorrow, for you do not know what a day may bring.}

 

And I'm not very good at Psalm 46:10 either.

{Be still. And know that I AM GOD.}

So when I graduated and my planner mode kicked into over-drive, God began tugging at my future-focused heart, saying, "Be still. Right now. That is where I want you. Savor right now.  Live what I've given you today, each day, every day."  

And so the name of my blog.  Ann Voskamp exactly expresses my thoughts on this and what the Lord so tenderly taught (and is teaching) me, so read them in her God-gifted eloquence.

  

The Only Place to Really Live

"I name years like I’ve named babies because each one births a different life that needs to be raised up and remembered.

The oldest of those six babies we birthed in ten years, he was twelve when I named the first year, and that was the Year of Eucharisteo, that Greek word that the girl with the Dutch name needed to learn.

I had to bang it out, late at night, a whole ream of lines and pages about learning that word and how it changed my lifebecause I’m slow and handicapped like that and need word markers to grope along to figure my life out and I’m still learning to get my life around the hard eucharisteo.

The next year was the Year of the Communion and I didn’t come close to fully unlocking the mystery to the Oneness. But I still want this: communion more than consumption, God to fill my canyons because nothing in this world can.

But wanting does not make a reality. The Farmer’s father, his name is Jan made John when he crossed the ocean with a suitcase full of prayers and that John had six sons and they named fully two of them John. I think I may need to name another year (or two) Communion.

I don’t have a favorite child of these crazy and wondrous half dozen, but I do think last year, the Year of Yes, may be a secret favorite of the years.

It went like this: “For no matter how many promises God has made, they are “Yes” in Christ.” 2 Corinthians 1:20 and “Yes, you can, yes, that’s an ingenious idea, yes, make that, yes, yes, yes, yes, honor, yes, love God with your whole heart, yes, submit to one another, yes, say YES to Love and Christ and Grace, and Now and YES!

And it went like this too: Yes does mean more mess, but isn’t this how we bless?

Yes gave our children permission to expand wings, had me trembling on planes with wings of my own, opened up life to God and let all His amazing grace carry us. I still said too many nos. So does the year of Yes have to end or could we keep agreeing with Him in this moment, soar higher into what is?

My sister sits rubbing the curve of her 36 week baby ripe stomach and I ask her if they’ve picked one yet, a name, this for her fifth, the four before all girls and all with names of only three letters, all ending in the same Jewish “a.” Sometimes it’s hard to know what comes next because of what’s already come before. Years can all end in the same ah-ha too. I think I’ve picked a name for this New Year.

Wiping off the table after lunch last week, the name comes to me, like crumbs falling into the hand.

The snow’s falling and my mind’s racing ahead with all of the things that need to be done and there’s still the pots and pans soaking and the laundry to be switched over and learning plans to be sketched out for the new year and how many emails that should have been responded to last week because there are real people that I really care about at the end of those notes and I have to get to the post office today and the calendar squares are fattening a year that isn’t even born yet and I am only a little bit terrified of how to live.

The snow’s so quiet, coming straight down… knowing where it’s going.

I’m wiping off the table. It strikes me: I am not here. My mind’s lunging ahead, already dashing onto the next and the next and the next, tripping over this and that and falling all over the future that isn’t.

I profane this moment when I won’t stay in it.

I desecrate now when I dismiss it in my push for the next. There are snowflakes sticking to the glass of the window.Right there at the table’s edge I can see them clustering together, piling, melding on the pane. I almost missed it.

I miss living this moment because my head’s already moved into the next moment — the one that isn’t even here yet — and when I am not in this moment but trying to shove into a moment that doesn’t even exist — I miss out on living at all. I may bodily be in this space but I am not even alive.

Could I be walking through the years but not even be alive?

There’s a dishcloth in my hand. The skin of my hand is the border of me in time, my skin the way of keeping me within the frame of now. Is this why God puts us who are souls into bodies? To keep us in this moment?

My body is my boundary, keeping my soul in this space.

I take a deep, long breath. This moment comes straight down.

I’m at the brink of another year and I really want to live… and this moment here is the only one I can live in. Worrying about tomorrow robs me of the moment I have right now and I can feel the vortex of the future sucking me in, down, away, sucking the life and now right out of me. Fear is always the flee ahead. Mentally racing ahead to imagine some catastrophe looming round the next corner. Fear is always the flee ahead. And that is what leaves us for dead.

The only place I can ever be alive is right here.

Right where these feet are is the only place joy will ever be possible.

So there it is: The Year of Here.

The years do all have themes.

Eucharisteo was the beginning, the foundation, the rock under it all that never stops reshaping my life and giving thanks for this moment is what keeps me in this moment. It’s this living eucharistically that draws me into God who comes in the moment, into communion, and what could I say but yes? Yes to here. This gift, this grace, this moment.

When I am present to the Presence of God meeting us in this moment, I am not worrying, I am not regretting, I am not chaffing, griping, fuming, fretting.

Be all here: and be holy.

Be all here: and be happy.

Because the Presence of I AM always fills the present moment.

Be all here and be at peace… content… awake —- Alive. When I am mindful of this moment, the mind fills with God and the heart fills with peace and joy-thanks fills the prayers and isn’t the only way God can come to us is through the door of this moment? Here.

The flakes are larger now. Lingering. Their lacy edges entwine. This is the thing, the real thing of living —- Notice now: and you win joy. God is beautiful here.

I say yes to Him and the year of here and press my hand against the cool of the window.

Joy’s a snowflake on the sill — it lives only here in this moment."

I hope this will be a challenge and encouragement to you, as it is to me.  The Father wants me, all of me, right here, right now.  And wants me simply to trust him with the all the rest.   

{He is enough.} 

*I ordered her new book, One Thousand Gifts: A Dare to Live Fully Right Where You Are, over two weeks ago, and it finally arrived yesterday.  Chapter one last night. Chomping at the bit to read chapter two.  

Snapshot: 2010

So I'm writing this at 4am…been wide awake since 2:45…good thing I don't have to work tomorrow because I'm *not* one of those people who can go on 4 hours of sleep! So while I was tossing and turning I got to thinking about the "2010 year in review" posts I've read the past few days on other blogs and thought that would be neat to have to look back on in a few years. My Grandmama Loftin is amazing at remembering when things happened…she can tell you the year, and many times the month, that just about anything happened—in her life, her family's life, her friends' lives, and history in general. She always says her Daddy was like that, too, and I think it also may be a result of her habit of journaling…I wish the gene had passed to me! So this post is my attempt to remember like Grandmama does. And one more thing…as I was lying there wide awake thinking about the year, the song "Blessed Be Your Name" by Matt Redman kept running through my mind. If you've never heard it, here are the lyrics. I think they are really powerful because they remind me that regardless of what happens in life—our 2010 had both much blessing and loss—God is still good and He is worthy to be praised. 

Blessed Be Your Name

In the land that is plentiful

Where Your streams of abundance flow

Blessed be Your name

Blessed Be Your name

When I'm found in the desert place

Though I walk through the wilderness

Blessed Be Your name

Every blessing You pour out

I'll turn back to praise

When the darkness closes in, Lord

Still I will say

Blessed be the name of the Lord

Blessed be Your name

Blessed be the name of the Lord

Blessed be Your glorious name

Blessed be Your name

When the sun's shining down on me

When the world's 'all as it should be'

Blessed be Your name

Blessed be Your name

On the road marked with suffering

Though there's pain in the offering

Blessed be Your name

Every blessing You pour out

I'll turn back to praise

When the darkness closes in, Lord

Still I will say

Blessed be the name of the Lord

Blessed be Your name

Blessed be the name of the Lord

Blessed be Your glorious name

Blessed be the name of the Lord

Blessed be Your name

Blessed be the name of the Lord

Blessed be Your glorious name

You give and take away

You give and take away

My heart will choose to say

Lord, blessed be Your name

{2010}

  January

• Started this blog.
  
• I started teaching part-time at The Bowie Reading & Learning Center.
  
• Paul started back to school in pursuit of his B.S.
  
• We officially joined Central Church…so thankful God led us here.
  

February

• We began going to Firm Foundations connecting point class (aka Sunday School)…another wonderful blessing.
  

March

• We celebrated our precious niece's 1^st birthday!
  
• I read Here's to Hindsight: Letters to My Former Self
  by Tara Leigh Cobble.
  

April

• I resigned at the Bowie Center because I was hired full-time by a retail portrait studio.
  

May

• After only two weeks at the portrait studio, I realized there were things about the company and work environment/scheduling that I (we) did not want to live with, especially knowing it would not change and would inevitably get worse, and I decided to quit.
  
• Reggie's 1^st birthday party!
  
• I tossed around the idea of a career in law…talked with a friend who is a lawyer, shadowed a paralegal for a day, and knew that wasn't me either.
  
• Paul began taking flying lessons to earn his private pilot's license!
  
• I figured out that I am "supposed to be" a teacher and began researching Master's programs, finally deciding on Union University.
  
• I read Capture His Heart by Lysa TerKeurst.
• I read A Thousand Splendid Suns by Khaled Hosseini.
  

June

• Hosted a "Sip and See" with Shana to honor Robin and her sweet, new, little one Olivia!
  
• Paul's step-brother Brent got married.
  
• I began teaching summer camps (continued in July) with Computer Explorers, which is owned by a sweet girl in our connecting point class. Lego Building, Dinosaur Digging, and Solar Robotics Constructing…fun!
  

July

• I took (and PASSED!) the PRAXIS English Content Knowledge 7-12 Test.
• I read The Power of a Praying Wife by Stormie Omartian.
  

August

• We vacationed with Nick, Kelly, and Taylor at Panama City Beach. so. much. fun. I read Wuthering Heights by Emily Bronte.
  
• We celebrated our 1^st year of marriage!
  
• I started grad school!
  
• I started substitute teaching at Briarcrest.
  
• We moved my grandparents (mom's parents) from Starkville to an "assisted living/nursing home" here. Hate they can't live in their own home anymore, but glad they are closer to us now.
  

September

• Travelled to Starkville with Nick & Kelly for the Bulldawg Football season opener against Memphis. Enjoyed Mugshots and a Win!
  

October

• My BFF from elementary school, Stacy, tied the knot on a blustery day at the beautiful Hunt Phelan Home on Beale!
  
• I celebrated my 23^rd birthday, and my class just so happened to be "held online" that night, so that was a great perk!
  
• My great Uncle James passed away. Such a kind man, always with a smile. He was married to one of my most favorite people in the entire world, my Aunt Anne (my Granddaddy Loftin's sister).
  
• We travelled to Starkville for Homecoming and stayed with Jim, Anne, Walt, and Eleanor. So fun to get to spend some time with them and enjoy the game!
  
• My cousin Scott passed away. Heartbroken for his wife and two little ones.
  
• I started working part-time (when I'm not subbing) for a guy in our connecting point class who is a financial planner.
  
• Paul was laid off from his job.
  

November

• My sweet college roomie Diana leaves for boot camp after joining the Army National Guard!
  
• Lots of family Thanksgiving celebrations. We are blessed, indeed.
  
• We beat the Black Bears (ha!) and WIN the EGG BOWL 31-23! :)
• Finished reading Crazy Love by Francis Chan. Left me convicted and challenged.

December

• 12/1 My cousin Chad was killed while serving as a Marine in Afghanistan. Heartbroken for his bride (they got married just about month after we did) and his doting mama.  
• The 8^th marked 6 years that Paul and I have been together. Wow!
  
• With the help of my mom, we hosted a Christmas "open house" for both sides of our family. Everyone made it, except for my brother and sister. So fun to have almost everyone together and hope to make this an annual tradition!
  
• We celebrated Paul's 24^th birthday with one of his favorite meals (meatloaf) and his new favorite dessert as of Thanksgiving…pecan pie! For those of you that know Paul, him even trying pecan pie is a milestone!
  
• Lots of family Christmas celebrations. Again, we are blessed, indeed.
• My Granddaddy Loftin's cancer returned again, this time in his liver. :( Began three rounds of chemo (1 round=3 consecutive days of treatment and then three weeks off before the next one).
• I read Same Kind of Different As Me by Denver Moore and Ron Hall. *a must-read*
• Rang in 2011 at Nick & Kelly's!

Looking forward to what God is going to do and teach us in 2011! Many blessings to you this new year!

 

different by design

"get past differing and get on with making a difference in one another's life. God made us different--not to hinder but to help." 
-- From my reading today in Capture His Heart by Lysa TerKeurst.

ouch! I needed this admonishment this morning, but what an amazing way to think about our roles as husbands and wives--to make a [positive] difference in each other's lives.

If you are a wife, you need to read this book.  [It is only about an inch thick, so no excuses!] It is truly changing me and how I interact with Paul.  There are tons of marriage books out there, but, to me, this one is incredible.  It is concise, but it is FULL of God's truth, encouragement, and ideas for practical application.  God is teaching me so much about how to be fulfilled and how to be a blessing to my husband.  I mess up continually, but there is freedom and joy in knowing this: I don't have to [and can't!] do it on my own...the Lord's grace is sufficient...and his Holy Spirit is ever present to help me be what He has called me to be. 

catching up.

Of course when I started this blogging thing I never intended to abandon ship for a month and a half! Nevertheless, here's a smattering of thoughts and happenings from life over the last few weeks...

a *good* read: One night last week I stayed up till 2am reading--and anyone who knows me knows I am not a night owl. And even as much as I love to read, and even if it is a brilliant book, I usually find it impossible to hold my eyes open. However, this was not the case the other night. I went to bed thinking I would just read the usual 3.2 pages of one of the 6 half-finished books on my nightstand [The Shack, A Prayer for Owen Meany, The Power of a Praying Wife, The 60 Minute Marriage Builder, The Spirit of Loveliness, & Here's to Hindsight] before I nodded off. I picked up Here's To Hindsight: letters to my former self, (the random book by an unfamiliar author I had just recently grabbed on clearance at the bookstore at church one Wednesday night before Bible study...it is a very bad thing for me to have even 5 minutes to kill anywhere near a bookstore), and could not put it down. Here's to Hindsight is by Tara Leigh Cobble, a Tennessee born and raised indie musician who loves Jesus, and who, as I quickly discovered, has a real knack for speaking truth. Her book--the way she told her story-- is just as real and both painfully and refreshingly honest as it gets. I saw myself on many of the pages. I could go on, but if you're up for a read that will challenge, encourage, and even entertain you, Here's to Hindsight is a definite "must read" and read again. Check her out: www.taraleighcobble.com

p.s. I'm liking her music too...

*dirt* under my nails: I'm itching to plant some flowers! I'm hoping for a warm and sunny weekend soon so we can get to work on and in our yard. Just this week our backyard has been invaded by lots of clever impostors (i.e. pretty weeds). But I've been glad to see them because that means no more dead, blah winter! I really do have a hatred for the cold. Hopefully, I have inherited by mom's and my aunt Cherri's (mom's big sister) green thumbs. They both have always loved flowers, being outside, and making things grow. And as I get older, I am more and more grateful that they see making their yards a lovely place to be as something that is fun, therapeutic, and never finished. In other words, I'm glad they have never hired out the lawn mowing and pansy planting. I'm usually off work on Fridays, and as of right now, the forecast is predicting sunny and 70 degrees...let's hope they've got it right (you never know with Memphis weather), and I'll be off to the greenhouse for some seeds and plants!

Consider how the lilies grow. They do not labor or spin.
Yet I tell you, not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these.
Luke 12:27

This is a photo from Jones Greenhouse in Slayden, MS. My mom's best friend Katey along with the rest of her sweet family owns and runs this top-notch flower-growing place. My mom worked there when I was little. Love this picture.

turning *one*: Our niece Taylor (Paul's sister's little girl) will be celebrating her first birthday on the 26th of this month! Like they say, time really does fly, and she just keeps getting cuter and more fun to watch! She's almost walking...I think she can do it, she just likes to see us all make fools of ourselves trying to get her to! ha! She can say "Paul"--it comes out more like "Pah," but she definitely recognizes him. We're still working on "Ray Ray." :) She already knows how to point to her ears, feet, and belly, tell you a secret, and blow you a kiss. We tend to think she's genius, but we may be partial. I can't wait to see her dig in to her cake!

@ 6 months